You Know You Are From Rochester When...
- "Waking up with the Wease" doesn't mean that you have a respiratory infection.
- The thought of eating a "garbage plate" makes your mouth water.
- The only thing at the annual May Lilac Festival is snow.
- The worst four-letter word you could say is "Fuji".
- You can't swim at the beach.
- You thought that you had figured out that alternate-parking thing, but wind up with a ticket anyway.
- Toronto is about 70 miles away, but it takes four hours to get there.
- The name "Greater Rochester International Airport" is bigger than the airport itself.
- There's an 800 number to report a pothole in the road.
- You know that a "Can of Worms" is not something that you take fishing.
- Your baby's first word is "Wegmans".
- You ask lifetime residents where the George Eastman House is, but they don't know either.
- In a city where it snows at least 90 inches a year, they build a new sports stadium with no roof on it.
- It can be 70 degrees one day, below freezing the next, and you think nothing of it.
- Your mother is buying outfits to wear to Wegmans.
- Your low-fat diet is never low enough to exclude an Abbott's custard.
- You order a white hot and a pop, and the counterman knows what you're talking about.
- You can travel from Egypt to Greece in about a half-hour by car.
- D&C is a newspaper, not a medical procedure.
- There are no hamburgers, only ground steak.
- You can go to any mall on a Saturday and see at least 5 people you either work with, went to school with or dated.
- A musical comes to town 10 years after its Broadway premier and the entire town goes nuts! (e.g. Miss Saigon)
- You awaken from a deep sleep, look at the clock and see that it's 6:00, but you have no idea whether it's AM or PM.
- When 18+ inches of snow falls overnight, but you never thought of NOT going to work.
- You are perplexed when friends from other cities come to visit and want to "see the sights".
- A flagpole strung with white lights seems like an acceptable alternative to a municipal Christmas tree.
- In winter if the temperature hits 45 degrees and the sun comes out, people walk around downtown wearing shades and no jackets.
- There are places at the poles that seem to get more sunlight during the winter months than we do.
- Wegmans is somewhere to go on a Friday night, for entertainment.
- You know who Vinnie and Angelo are.
- You define summer as three months of bad sledding.
- You think that people from Pennsylvania have an accent.
- Halloween is snowed out with great regularity.
- You have experienced frostbite and sunburn in the same week.
- Your year has two seasons: Winter and Construction.
- Half the change in your pocket is Canadian, eh.
*I am not the author of these. Mike Juda is.